Sunday, January 14, 2024

3 Random Things - Week 8

 After-party

The last two posts were a bit heavy, and so I wanted to make this one lighter. This is the time people would be trying to find the funnier side of their new year resolutions. I have decided to go another way today - the fun in the after party.

Those who have drinks claim that that is the way to have a good time. Those who don't have drinks will say that you don't need drinks to have a good time. Now, those who don't have drinks, but still goes to the party will say that the best way to have a good time is to watch others get drunk and then do/say things.

And today, for your guilty pleasure, I bring to you three such stories of drunken innocence. For the anonymity of the protagonists, we will describe all of these as stories of Mr.Raj.

P.S. The stories mentioned below never happened in real life. I pinky swear.

***

1. Tequila Sunrise

This was the first time Raj had had alcohol in his life. It was a party for something (nobody remembers why there was a party, but just a vague recollection that there indeed was a party on that day). Raj started off with beer, and with enough cajoling ended up having some stronger drinks as well. One of his friends, who recently returned from Bangalore, was going on about the variety of drinks that he had had at Pubs over there.

Like at the end of most parties, the entire group went outside the room at around midnight, because someone said they wanted icecream. Shepherded by the non-drinkers, the group eventually got to the icecream parlour and everyone placed their order, as best as they could.

A poor boy, working the graveyard shift, was distributing the icecreams. Suddenly, Raj started quarelling with him. Raj was enraged by the fact that the Tequila sunrise he ordered didn't actually have Tequila.

2. Smoking is injurious to health

Raj had started drinking, but not smoking. Being a sane person, he knew the bad effects of smoking. But once he got drunk, the sane person would leave the building, and so Raj started smoking when he had drinks. This story is from the first time he smoked.

Actually, this story is from the next day. The party went on late into the night, Raj got back to his home early in the morning, and went to sleep without breakfast. By 12pm, a slightly hungover Raj came out of his room and asked for food. His mother said that rice is ready, and asked him to take lunch by himself, as she was doing some gardening.

Raj started eating the food, and his soul left his body. He could taste the smoke from last night in the food he was having. He panicked, went to his room, brushed his teeth again, came back and tried the food. No difference. He went to his room, and called his friend, trying to get some advice on dealing with the problem. His friend, who was also knackered from the party last night, was not picking up the phone.

As Raj kept trying to connect with his friend, he heard his sister call out to his mother from the dining room.

"Ammae. Chettan choor ividae vachittu poi. Ith adiyil pidichu ena thonunnae. Karinju irupunde."

("Amma. He has left without eating anything. This rice is smelling weird. I think it got burned while cooking.")

3. Orthodox drinking

As we move along the drinking career of Raj, we see him arriving late for a party one day, as he was working late at office. Actually, he had worked late, went out with his office friends, had some drinks and now reached this party - the reason being that someone had sponsored a Whisky for this party. This was the first time Raj was having Whisky in his life. He went up to the designated bartender of the group and said without much inhibition, "I'll have one large whisky - orthodox".

"Enthutt??" was the reply in typical Thrissur slang. ("What?")

It took some time and explanation from Raj for all to understand that he had meant to say "on the rocks".

***

So, that's all for this week then.
Have a great weekend!!
'til next week.

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