AWKWARD

Now, who among us have been lucky enough to get through a day without a single awkward moment?? It's an essential part of your daily life, which rears its unwelcome head in a variety of ways, and mostly, when you think things couldn't get any worse..

So, here's three of the more awkward moments I've been through or have heard of.. Hope you take in both the humor and the lessons from them..

1) The Metro Incident

There is (or was) a Malayali Restaurant in Dwaraka, some 15 km from Delhi. And in the first year of my "vanavasam" (the 14 years of forest exile, which was given to Rama) at Delhi, I would make the 2 hour journey from my place in Gurgaon to that place. And the incident that I'm talking about on the very first journey I made over there.

I was in the Noida-Dwaraka Line of the New Delhi Metro Rail, travelling in it for the first time. With my two best buddies, and a friend of one of them as our guide, we were undertaking the last lap of our journey to eat morsel after morsel of that sweet homely food.

But fate was against us. It had to make the last lap as tough as possible, and so we had to adjust ourselves in a tightly packed coach. We had already traveled 1 hour on another metro, standing throughout that journey. So, we ended up cursing our luck for putting us through this ordeal for another hour.

What we didn't know was that the lady luck had other plans for us. At some stop, I don't remember which, almost the entire train got out. But then again, only one seat opened up near where we stood. You had to be quick enough to claim that, but I did eventually manage to fend off the vested interest of my friends in that seat, and made it my own.

And just as I got settled in my seat, in walks one of the most beautiful creatures I have ever seen in my life. And, then again, as my luck would have it, she stood in one corner, such that I couldn't see her as I was vertically challenged right then. But my three friends, who were not so challenged, had full, unrestricted view to that angel of eternal beauty.

This was the cue for me to try and get up. Since I had made quite a scene of getting the seat, I couldn't just let the seat go, without arising suspicions from my fellow travelers (ya, I'm that paranoid/crazy). So, I had to give up the seat for one of these three monkeys, and make myself out to be the good guy here. But my friends had lost all interest in the seat, and were adamant that I should enjoy the seat for myself, while they enjoyed something entirely else.

I looked around the metro for any other sort of reason to get up. "Where were the senior citizens, pregnant ladies or women with babies in their hand, when you need one??" was the marquee running through my mind.

Still undeterred, I repeated my pleas to my friends to take the seat, and give me the chance to watch her. It fell on deaf ears, and stone-cold hearts.

Time passed, and another metro stop came up. One gentleman who was standing near us, came up to us as he was leaving and said, "Ningalkku onnu avanae nilkkan samathikyam aayirunu." (You could have let him stand up)

That's right. I was making all those requests to my friends in Malayalam (so that the gal wouldn't understand), and this Malayali gentleman was happily lapping up the sight of my plight, and put an end to my misery with this above dialogue.

Later, we came to know that Dwaraka and Noida had a substantially large Malayali population, and hence, the metro line between them was a danger zone for us.

Needless to say, we never talk when we get in the Noida-Dwaraka line. Sign language works just fine, and without all these awkward moments.

Side note : Irrespective of that humiliating incident, the food was heavenly, and my appetite did justice to what was served.

2) The HOUSE-FUL phenomenan

First, a little bit of trivia. If you spend about 10-15 minutes everyday at the office in the bathroom, by the end of the year, you would have had about 7-8 working days worth of personal time at office, which no one can hold you accountable for.. Smart, ain't it??

Well, let me start the story by saying that this happened to a friend. I swear, it was not me.

The thing is, this friend of mine at office, Mr.A, has a very weak digestive system. This essentially means that he'll be seen running to the bathroom almost every other hour.

The layout of our bathrooms is that there are three toilets on one side, and urinals on the other.

Well, this incident happened before I came to know about his "disease".

I was freshening up one afternoon, when in walks Mr.A. He's apparently in great hurry, and moves to door A, and tries to open it. Closed.

A little tensed, he moves to door B. Also closed.

Now, it was the make or break moment. He casts a loose glance at me to see if I was noticing. I was actually enjoying the bathroom version of that game show, where you choose doors.

Mr.A walks up to door C, keeps his hand on the lever, and turns it. No luck, it was closed as well.

He then turns around, gives me this half sheepish, half ashamed kind of smile, and runs out of the bathroom.

The next I heard was that he was seen in the next floor's bathroom. :D

3) Employee of the Month

Well, I got one more story about Mr.A. And I guess you would have guessed what has happened from the title and his "disease". Well, I ain't gonna explain. This is not an engineering college for me to spoon feed you everything. This is my blog, and if you can't get an idea of what happened, well, ask me. I'll write about it sometime else.

It's 1.30am, and I guess I should head off to my dream land, where there are no awkward moments.

P.S. I'm writing something (or anything for that matter) after some 6 months. If you have had it in you to read it till here, I thank you for humoring me. Thanks a lot matey.. :)

This season so far..

I fell in love with Arsenal through FIFA 2004.. But I started following them only for the last 3 years.. And have been a die-hard fan of Arsenal for the past year or so.. So much so that Arsenal is the only thing I search more on than, well.. you know.. ;)

So, after this 4-0 at San Siro, I felt I should discuss my views on this season.. In case you only watched last night's match this season, go through the main points of our season in this brief summary..

The Begining..

We buy Gervinho & OX.. AW is criticized for bringing OX..
We lose 2 matches in 4.. Sell Fab, Nasri..We get "humiliated" 8-2 at OT, playing a second string team (not for any reason of ours) against the League champions & CL finalists..
Media, and subsequently, inspired fans want Wenger's head..
He brings in last second signings - "panic buys"...

**Nobody seems to remember us beating Udenise in a critical tie, getting into CL for this year..

Next 3 matches

We still lose two.. Panic buys are blamed, so is AW..
"Relegation Battle for Arsenal" reads the papers..

From Oct to Dec 31st

Nobody notices the march of the Gunners from 17th in the table to 4th..
AW said somewhere in between this crisis, "Lets' see where we are at the end of the year.. Then judge our season.."
And his loyal cadres made his words come true..

January

We lose all the games except the crucial FA Cup tie, which we win, courtesy TH14 (more like TH12).. Everybody questioned AW for bringing him back.. But the King erased all doubts with his first shot..

** Nobody questioned Sir Alex for bringning in Scholes..

And at the end of January, we were in a battle for 4th with Chelsea, Newcastle, and Liverpool..
Again, Media, and subsequently, inspired fans want Wenger's head..

** The OX doesnt seem to be such a bad idea now for both media & fans..

February

We win 7-1.. AW and players are praised by the Media, and the fans..
We win 2-1 on a pitch, which seemingly was dug up, a day before.. Again, praise..

We lose 4-0 on a similar clay court, miles away from home 3 days later.. Its all AW's fault all over again..

Now, Next game.. the FA Cup tie with Sunderland..

We win.. Praise.. We lose.. Crisis..


My thoughts..

I have always felt, and this claim will be supported by many fellow gooners, that Arsenal is at the end of a media rebuff.. Anything we do is looked under a microscope; we can never be without a crisis..

eg : When we won 7-1, the best win of the season, with goals shared all round; Marca comes & says RvP said he wants to go to Real.. Even though RvP denied it on twitter, it was enough to ruin the week for us..

Fans believe whatever media throws at them.. When the next bit of "news" is a tweet button away, I want you to believe in this team, not the media.. It might be technically less efficient than the teams before, but they want to win, and win at Arsenal..

And I want you to support AW.. Of the panic buys, Arteta is in the top 5 passers in the game in Europe, Mert is a slow genius, Santos is Clichy 2.0, Gervinho is Nasri 2.0 and Ox is Walcott 2.0.. If that aint enough, there's Campbell who people say are Henry 2.0..

IF you still say AW is poor, its only cos you cant see the big picture.. AW started a journey with us gooners.. A dream to take Arsenal to the top of the footballing elites.. He cut down on his spending, built a stadium, developed talents, but kept his hope on a boy, who grew home sick.. And when that boy went home, his dreams were crushed, for no fault of his own..

I agree that he has made mistakes.. Park, for eg.. But he is a gooner like us, and wants only the best for this club.. Only thing is he's thinking long term, and we are seeing short term..

Pep is seen as the man who changed Barca into this world class team.. But it was the foresight of many before him, which left him with this talented pool of players, playing with a similar philosophy.. Please dont underestimate Wenger's foresight..

In short, all I want to tell you people is never lose hope in Arsenal or Arsene, cos of what media says.. When AW says its over, it's over.. Until then, be a true gooner and support your team..

IN ARSENE WE TRUST

one call

** Warning: This story has a sad ending. So, if you are a weakheart like me, I would request you to not proceed further. It has taken me two weeks of preparation to just right this **

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“So, you phone can make outgoing calls.” She said as she answered the phone, after what seemed to an eternity of ringing. But I was cautious as not to impose my urgency as I started chatting with her.

“Well, you are the one who always asks me to do something different.”

“Oh. So, is this call because you have finally decided to heed my words??”

“Let’s not get into that.”

“You never want to listen to what I want to say. Well, leave it then. So, why did you call? There must be some reason.”

“Nope, nothing. I just felt like talking to you, and ask about how things are over there.””

“It’s the same as it was when I called you this morning. Everyone’s good.”

“Well, that’s great. I hope it continues to be same.”

“Why the sudden urge to ask such questions and make such philosophical comments?”

“Nothing at all. It was just conversation filler.”

“Hmmm.”

“Well, I got some work to do. Talk to you later.”

“Ok bye. Don’t work too much. Take care of your health.”

Stifling an ironic smile, I replied “Always. Love ya. Bye.”

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After cutting the call, I laid down on my bed. The same bed, where it happened a few minutes before. I had thought that wasting a Saturday at home would be the better option, instead of going to the mall with friends, while my roomies went for their weekly Saturday overtime. But it all went wrong when I felt a bite on my ankle and a sharp pain searing up through my legs.

As we hadn’t had time to buy cots since moving into this flat some 5 months before, we have our mattresses on the floor. And somehow or the other, a snake had found its way into my room, and it bit me as I lay there enjoying a movie.

My knee jerk action was enough for it to slither away into the hole from which it came, but it had done its damage. I called the security of my flat, and asked him to send help, someone to carry me away.

I didn’t know what to do, after I made that call. I was thinking of why the snake bit me, how it got in, and how the hell a snake was able to make its way up to the 9th floor of this building. But it all seemed trivial now. I just accepted the fact that I might be on the verge of death, and if I had to do something, what would it be.

Her face was the only thing that came to me. That’s why I made that last call. And now as I lay there, I decided to send a message to her as well.

I can now hear the security outside my house. Oh Shit!! I had left it locked. How will he be able to get in? I can’t get up in this condition. I just can’t feel my legs. And I’m feeling drowsy.

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And as the thuds and kicks on the door grew louder, Arjun looked up. All he was able to see was the blurred vision of the family enjoying a picnic on the laptop screen. As he slowly drifted into unconsciousness, he thought to himself, “I wonder if they will live happily ever after. I hope they will”

***********************************************************************************

Beep. Beep.

Some 2000 miles away, Kavita picked up her phone. She read the message, and called out to her husband.

“Hear what your engineer son has to say. ‘I love you Mom and Dad. You have always done the best for me. And tell, Karan to study and to be able enough to support you people.’ First a call, and now this. Something is definitely wrong with that boy today.”

The Ultimate Peer Praise

Ever since the days of watching "FRIENDS", I have always wondered about how it would be if the Ross-Monica-Chandler situation happened in some friendship circle around me.. Let me make this clear to those poor souls, who might not have been exposed to the sheer brilliance of, non-arguably, the greatest act by man ever..

Ross and Chandler have been best buddies since their college days.. And, as I see it now, they were part of a lucky few best friends, who got jobs in the same city, and gotta hang out with each other like in college, after college..

And Monica is Ross's sister, who happens to live in the apartment opposite to Chandler.. And these three, along with their other three phenomenal friends, Rachel, Phoebe and Joey, hang out at Monica's all the time..

Now, you people would have seen enough movies to understand what must have happened..

Well, into the fifth or sixth season, Monica and Chandler fall in love with each other.. They keep it as a secret from Ross for most of that season.. But once Ross finds out, all hells breaks loose.. Well, that's expected..

A brother, no matter how lenient or impressed, would not allow his best friend to be in a relationship with his sister.. Its basic human psychology.. Such a triangle always has a risk of making all the three relationship fail.. If you want proof, there is an episode when these three start sharing secrets of the others.. And if they hadn't stopped in time, everything could have got ruined..

Anyways, you might be wondering, why the hell I'm talking about all this.. That's cos I heard from one reliable source the following conversation, which was said to have happened with, between a friend of his and that friend's friend..

(After the usual, who is the one with the worst record with gals in the battle of the higher despness fight..)

A : You have known me for almost an year.. Can you tell me one thing?? Knowing me, will you let your daughter go out with me??

B : To tell the truth.. If I could, I would have allowed you to marry my sister..

A (stupefied) : huh??

B : Of all the recent contacts that I've made, I think you are the only one, who doesn't drink, smoke or have any other socially unacceptable habits.. You are a good guy at heart, and if you weren't of an another religion, I would have asked you to marry my sister..

A (still more stupefied, and partially blushing): Err... Thanks..

That is not the way a normal conversation would have progressed in, but due to the spur of the moment and/or the people involved, what came out was a gem of a praise to A..

The Ultimate Peer Praise.. That I'll let you marry my sister..

Bad day

Coming to write something after a derby game, and a derby game we lost, you would expect me to mourn the decline of Arsenal.. But I guess enough has already been said and written about it.. I'm going to talk about music for a change..


From October last year to this September, I had come to take music as more of a pass time than a passion.. Well the difference is that no matter which song is on, my reaction would be the same.. Let it be the crappy songs or the awesome ones, I deemed it fit only to be some random background noise.. But it all changed once I got back from home..


To explain how it changed, I need to tell you about my on-off relationship with music.. I liked hearing music, like any other person, as I grew up.. But it started making a difference only when I reached 8th standard.. My grandmother, unfortunately, let it slip that my Father used to hear music while studying.. And being a son who wanted to be a xerox copy of his dad, from mannerisms to hobbies, I was quick to install the family stereo player at my study table (ya, it was in those days when you had to press play, stop, rewind and play to put a song on repeat)..


Of course, my father was not pleased with this arrangement.. I was not making the best of grades, and he didnt think that it would change with that old stereo player screaming radio and assorted film songs into my ears.. But he couldnt make me stop, because it was his own mother who gave him no foothold in the argument, by leaking to me the fact that his grades went up, when he started doing that..


And it all paid off for me by the time I reached 10th.. Yes, it took two years, but it was a momentous moment for me, when I finally hit a cent percent on a Maths test.. I am taking the liberty of puffing my ego by stating the fact that I have always been good with numbers.. But I never was able to weed out the simple mistakes, which always left me short (mostly, well short) of the full marks..


But that fateful day in 2004, I hit the 9th cloud.. And, my dad was there to celebrate it with me.. And as a special present (it were simpler days then), he got a new stereo cum CD player.. Well, not just for me.. It was for the entire family.. the old player had lived it life to the fullest, with me draining its blood in its old age..


Anyways, it was step forward in music for me.. I now had a varied range to select from - the Vintage Anathapuri FM, my steadily built stereo cassette collection, and the new CD base I was building..


All through this time, the songs I heard made a mark in my heart, either through its music, or its lyrics, or just some random instrument making a weird sound at some point in the song, which captured my attention.. So even though I was supposed to be learning, I would be waiting for that moment in the song which would make me happier than I was a second before..


And now, we fast forward to my 12th standard, when I got my portable CD player.. It meant that I could blast my favorite songs at full volume into my ears as I "studied" - let it be at the dinner table, on my bed or the couch.. It opened up another experience for me.. Of being with music for a larger share of my waking state.. Over the four years I have spoken of, music went from being an hour a day program, to a thing I had to have on whenever I was at home..


An interesting fact about that portable CD player.. One day, when for some reason it stopped working, I decided that hitting it hard 2-3 times with my writing board would make it work.. Needless to say, I had heard my last song from that player a few seconds before I executed that decision.. And that marked the beginning of the series of distasteful ends for various electronics devices, under my supervision..


Anyways, acquiring my music player/mobile camera/mobile phone, the legendary Nokia 6233, kicked off the third phase of my musical double life.. Having my favorite songs at a click of a button.. The ultimate freedom for any music lover.. So started my habit of plugging on my headphones whenever I was on the move.. Between home and college, when on trip with parents (looking back now, that was a lot helpful in ruining the times I could have spent with my family) etc etc..


Anyways, that was when I actually started moving away from the true sense of
enjoying music.. It's been written long before that anything, in excess is a danger.. So is music.. Over the four years of Engineering college life, I lost my weird sense of enjoying music.. Of enjoying the music, the lyrics, the instruments.. But more importantly, of enjoying the mood of the song, as it resonated with my mood..


I had specific songs.. Songs for happy times, songs for friendship, songs for romancing my heartthrob, songs for easing my broken heart, songs for goodbyes, songs for reunions.. But as I moved across 2006 to 2011, these songs lost their meanings, lost their soul for me.. Frankly speaking, my soul lost the ears with which I used to hear those songs..


And things took a turn for the worse, with me acquiring an Apple iPod Nano as part of my first salary blast.. Music became more of a luxury than a hobby.. Songs that touched my heart turned into random vibrations on my ears, that were lost in the background, as thoughts other than music filled my head..


And as I boarded the flight back to Gurgaon this September, I left all those things
behind.. Trying to find ways to make myself happy, by living the life I was living when I was a teenager, I'm going to back to music.. For comfort, for happiness..


I gave my iPod on loan to my brother.. He enjoys music more than me to lose his sense to that monster of a device.. I filled my phone with music, but only to keep me company when I on the go..


At home, I am hearing to, and constantly updating a Youtube playlist, which has all
those songs which made me happy in those years as a novice teen.. I'll publish those songs once I deem it fit to have something for everyone.. Until then, those beautiful songs from the years gone by will caress my ears as I am taken away on a beautiful journey by the music..


And as I told you, this was a bad day for me.. And to go with the mood, I have lined up a few songs on my playlist - "Kanner Poovintae" from Kireedom (Malayalam), "En Kadhalae" from Duet (Tamil), "Bin Tere" from I Hate Love stories (Hindi), and "Fact Fiction" by Mads Langer(English) to lull me to sleep as I forget this day with music..